33 Headlines About Beer That Are Perfect For Thrillist

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To: chicago@thrillist.com

From: abvchicago@gmail.com

Subject: 33 Headlines About Beer That Are Perfect For Thrillist

Dear Thrillist editors,

I’ve recently become aware of your website, and I love it! Not long ago, I was mentioning to my wife and friends that someone should make a version of Buzzfeed for men that also sells me shoes. The most inspiring articles I read were the following: Craft Beer Is Dead. Gose Killed It, The 19 Types of Beer Snobs, and the essential The 14 Best Beer Instagrammers In The Country. I am writing to tell you that I am interested in writing for your publication, and I believe I have the goods to get those click numbers higher than ever.

First, a little background: By day, I’m a schoolteacher that teaches Language Arts to teenagers. By night, I’m a beer podcaster, which on the artistry scale is somewhere between passive-aggressive breakroom note writers and the people who stack cases of soda into pictures. But as our literally hundreds of social media followers can attest, we know our beer!

Whether you give me a chance to write for you or not, I wanted to share with you these highly clickable article ideas. And don’t worry – I’ve thrown in some edgy and controversial topics too! I think I’d want to read all of these stories:

“24 Barrel Aged Beers You’re Drinking All Wrong”

“What Your Beer Cellar Says About You”

“8 Cats That Look Like Greg Koch’s Beard”

“I Have Opinions About Rauchbiers – Why You Should Too”

“22 Things You Didn’t Know About IBUs”

“These Winter Beer Recipes Really Cook Out The Beer Flavor”

“11 Benches You Have To Drink On Immediately”

“Why Grisettes Are The Best Beer Style – And Why They’re Ruining Beer”

“The Brewers We’d Go Gay (or Straight) For”

“14 Tart-Ass Beers To Crush This Summer Solstice”

“840 Words On Dunkels That’ll Change Your Stance On Euthanasia”

“These 16 IPAs Are Actually Brewed By Small Children”

“Meet The Awesome Landlord Who Accepts Your Shitty Homebrew As Rent”

“How Your Choice of Glassware Has Never Been Proper, Once”

“7 Beers That Are Actually Cursed”

“If The Characters From Wet Hot American Summer Were Beers”

“Why Beer Blending Will Be The Next Thing We Write About”

“The 32 Types of Untappd Reviewers”

“Study Shows That Most Homebrewers Are Impotent Man-Children”

“You Won’t Believe What This Brewery Put In A Beer (It’s Fish)”

“2 Steps To Being An Online Authority On Craft Beer”

“11 JackThreads Vests That Make Beer Taste Better”

“23 Rye Beers For Somnambulists”

“What Drinking These 6 Belgian Styles Says About Your Future”

“19 Overpriced Hipster Curios For The Craft Beer Enthusiast”

“Every Beer In America, Ranked By Amount Of Colors In Label Art”

“15 Beers With The Most Gluten Per Ounce”

“We Haven’t Mentioned Chipotle In A While, So, Chipotle Chipotle Chipotle”

“Barleywines That’ll Melt Your S.A.D., You Pussy”

“Check Out This Wacky-Ass Adjunct Stout”

“6 Roggenbiers Reviewed By Seth Rogen”

“If These Bill Murray Characters Were Beers”

“18 Brewers Share Their Favorite Sex Positions”

Thanks for your consideration!

-Ryan, ABV Chicago podcast

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